We live in a society that is very binary – that is, there is only one of two ways of being. You are either “this” or “that”, “us” or “them” or something is “right” or “wrong”. This mentality I have never understood although this life lesson was something that took me a while to grasp because of how we are socialized.
There is no such thing as “wrong”.
Ironically, sounds “wrong”, doesn’t it? It did so much to me that I had a really hard time grasping this concept. I am sure just like me, you can list off a whack of things that you consider “wrong”. What helped me to come to terms with this was realizing that not everyone has the same set of morale’s and ideals and that there is nothing “wrong” with that!
Around the time I was being taught this life lesson, someone violently attacked my then less than two year old great-niece. I was enraged to hear, “there’s obviously something to be learned here” and that it was “meant to happen”. At the time, I was ready to hunt the guy down but have since found compassion for someone who would do something like that wondering what has happened to them to act in such a manner.
You’re doing it wrong.
A huge part of the reason that it took me so long to get into using crystals, tarot and a myriad of other things was because of people who insisted that things had to be done a certain way and/or telling me I was doing it “wrong”. Because of this, my crystals and cards got very dusty in fear of me doing something “wrong” or out of order. I was so happy to come across a book which stated those sets of rules did not matter and an instructor who always says:
I provide, you decide.
We all have our own set of beliefs and ways in which they came about in our lives. For me, it’s whether or not something resonates with me: that is, if it feels “right” to me by filling me with positive thoughts and/or feelings. Some people prescribe to something because they read it in a book, word of mouth or because an authoritative figure said so. When I come across something that does not resonate with me, regardless of the source, I do not consider it “wrong” – just not “right” for me, accept it as something someone else feels is “right” and carry on.
I have found this life lesson to be essential in preventing myself from judging other people. I am human (that is, I am not perfect) and do shake my head at some people wondering how they can feel that some things are “right”. When I come across something that I don’t feel is “right” for me, I respect that as someone else’s truth and do my best not to judge them for it.
What might be right for me, may not be right for you, but that does not make it wrong!
This life lesson is one I learned over a decade ago. Having had a few years to think about and reflect on it has brought me to conclude: with any given ideal, both people can be “right”! Why does any one ideal have to be “right” or “wrong”? Why can’t both people be “right”?
One of my beliefs is that we are the creators of our own realities. What might be “right” in my own little world might be considered extremely “wrong” in someone else’s. I am a believer in mutual respect. While I can respect someone who is very passionate about their beliefs that do not resonate with me, I do not have any respect for people who tell me how “wrong” I am. Those are the types of people who have no place in my life.
Are you living your life by doing what is “right” for you or “right” for someone else? Have you ever not done something in your life because someone else told you it was “wrong”? Are you ready to start living a life that is “right” for you?